i think my tv is drunk
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Randomize
