if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize