It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
