I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize