Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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