Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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