Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
