Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
