Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
