i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
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