are you still at the devil's house?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
