I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Is it because I queefed?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
