she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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