So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
