Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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