I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize