Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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