Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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