The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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