So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
