is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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