Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
