Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
