I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
This is the high leading the old right now
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
