I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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