This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
