Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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