The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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