Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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