I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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