Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
He is an equal opportunity slut.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize