i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Randomize
