i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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