Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
