so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize