Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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