redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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