Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Randomize
