Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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