my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
