Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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