OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
