i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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