Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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