so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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