yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
