Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize
