The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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