I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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