You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
And then my night got REAL pukey
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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