in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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